3 replies to this topic

[Remy Hadley]

For the one I've been bringing up a bit, I need a bit of helping one the ending. I'm writing the outline right now, and I'm trying to make all the events lead up to the ending in a logical way I have two outcomes to the story!

So in the end, it comes down to either of these results:

1. He runs away. He takes a train to Chicago, and runs from his parents and their abusivenes. Before he leaves, he'd leave a gorgeous ring on Kate's bedstand with "I love you, Darling" engraved on the inside. (payed for with money he stole from his dad). And he leaves a note saying "Dear Katie, I love you more than anything in the world. I'm sorry to just up and run like this, but I needed to. Your a wonderful girl, and so beautiful. Stay that way! You mean the world to me Darling! Love, "Thomas" Paynen Diaz". Or something like that... And maybe something about making sure Jayden (her boyfriend) treats her right or something. He always calls her Darling....

2. Or Jayden (Katie's BF) tells the police on "Thomas's" parents because of a horrible incident that happened between the dad and Katie (Katie did to save Thomas, cause she felt it was right). So the parents are taken away and "Thomas" is sent to rehab (cause he did some of the drugs his parents always had lying around...). Katie's dad pays for a good rehab (Kate's dad is wealthy).


So, in case it helps, this story is technically about "Thomas". (I still keep changing my mind on his name! From Charlie, to Leo, to Jonah lol!). His story is told from the point of view of his best friend and the girl he absolutely loves, Katherine Depauw "Kate". (though he's the only one who can call her Katie without her grumbling). "Thomas's" real name is Paynen Diaz (to sound like Pain in the @$$, a joke his parents thought was hysterical). Kate gave him the nick name "Thomas" because she thought that Paynen wasn't a real name. This all happened when they were like, four. Now that they're coming close to sixteen, "Thomas" always goes by this.

So this little boy that Kate generally tells the story of, is her best friend ever, and she loves him to death (like a friend, not a lover ) She's wrapped up in her own boyfriend... but "Thomas" is the son of a drug dealer, as is his mom, really. Both very abusive. Oh, and random fact, for whatever reason, (when I started the story at 11), I made the parents very British. So Thomas talks all adorable like

I'm not sure which ending sounds better, of if I fully explained what I imagine it to be!

Thanks for all input!

~Haddie

[Eva Phoenix]

I'm liking the first ending - so it doesn't leave things wrapped quite up so nicely, if you know what I mean.

Paynen Diaz - that sounds like something my parents would have come up with.

[Katie-Nana]

How long is the story? For a short story the endings usually do not rap up so nicely so I would say go with the first one. For a novel/novella length story the second one might be do-able. Esp. if Katie brought about the arrest of "Thomas" parents.

I like both endings but the first one isn't as satisfying to readers who have invested a lot in a longer story, but the second one wouldn't work for a short story unless the entire story is about how Katie saves "Thomas" and everything else is just backstory.

I hope that makes sense.

[Remy Hadley]

It does! I was hoping for it to be a long story, though if it ends up a short story, then I can switch endings I guess

Cause I plan on starting the story on her present time, then she just kinda goes through a reminiscent like thing

Hmmm, that may work too. About Katie saving "Thomas"

~Haddie