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Need vs. Major vs. Help!!

Hello! I’m Kelsey, my husband is Justin. We have 3 beautiful daughters- Emaline Ruby, Hannah Grace, and Isobel Natalia. I am pregnant with a boy, and due in May. He will be named Ryan Jacob. We have recently decided to adopt a 3 year old boy. His name right now is Ryan Isaiah, as you can see, we have a problem! We need to find him a different name. I was already pregnant and had named baby Ryan before we decided to adopt big Ryan. Please help us find a name for big Ryan that fits with our other 4’s names. Thank you! -Kelsey, Justin, Emaline, Hannah, Isobel, baby Ryan and big Ryan

The Top Baby Name is...







Poll created: Apr 24, 2009
Total Votes: 1


So your still pregnant right? I’m kinda curious as to why you would change the 3 year old’s name, who has had the name for 3 years and not the unborn babies name??
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:45 PM | report
We have been calling the baby Ryan since the second I found out I was pregnant with a boy...our whole family knows him as Ryan, as well as our OBGYN. His nursery has his name painted in it and everything.
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 24, 2009 11:48 PM | report
Can they go by their mn? I think it would probably be hard to have to adjust to a new home and a new name.
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:49 PM | report
I agree I don’t see how a 3 year old is going to just have a new name, plus having a baby in the house with his old name. VERY CONFUSING!
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:50 PM | report
I have been talking to our adoption agent, and she has told us that it’s really not that uncommon for the new parents to change the child’s name, and the child DOES adjust well. We will probably keep Isaiah as his middle name so he still has part of his original name.
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 24, 2009 11:51 PM | report
Kind of strange, but okay! How about..

posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:55 PM | report
I understand you love the name Ryan, think of it this way either way your going to have a son named Ryan, it just might not be baby Ryan. Good Luck tho!
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:56 PM | report
I don’t see how it’s strange, a lot of adoptive parents change their new child’s name.

He has blonde hair and the most GORGEOUS blue eyes, so I do think that Aiden, Carson or Liam would fit him well, thanks!
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 24, 2009 11:56 PM | report
I think that’s kind of selfish of you to name your baby Ryan not considering how it might make the older Ryan feel.
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:57 PM | report
I don’t think that it is selfish at all. We did not know that we were going to get to adopt big Ryan until AFTER I was already pregnant, we knew it was a boy, and we had already had his nursery set up and personalized. We JUST found out that we are adopting big Ryan about 2 weeks ago.
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 24, 2009 11:58 PM | report
It more so sad than strange that you are making your adoptive son change his name and the bay isn’t even born.
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:59 PM | report
Maybe people have changed names of their adopted children, but did those children have to hear another child called their name and they were called something different? I think this will be confusing for the 3 yr old.
posted by guest :: Apr 24, 2009 11:59 PM | report
Oh, I see! Well.. I can’t say. I’ve never been in that situation.. all the negativity aside, it’s nice to see someone adopt. Congrats on the baby too!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:00 AM | report
Truly I could care less your opinions everyone. This is our family and we would just like name suggestions for our son that we’re going to adopt. Sure it might be confusing for big Ryan, but he will adjust. Our daughters have been calling the baby in my belly Ryan for a long time now, that would be confusing to them just as much as it will be to big Ryan. He WILL adjust, and we will pick a lovely name for him, without your help. Only one of you have actually suggested names for him.
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 25, 2009 12:02 AM | report
I would never do that to my little boy the 3 year old is plenty old enough to know his name & the unborn child has no clue at all. Let the poor little guy keep his name. What happens if later in life he finds out about this little story how will he feel that his name was changed & not his unborn brothers he will feel like his baby brother is more important because he is your REAL son ya its a little messed up
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:02 AM | report
HOW IS IT MESSED UP!? We have been calling the baby Ryan for much longer than we even knew we were going to be adopting Ryan!!! And no, his baby brother is no more important to us than he is. We love him already, what an idiotic thing for you to say. Big Ryan is JUST AS MUCH our "real" son as baby Ryan!!!!!
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 25, 2009 12:04 AM | report
but big Ryan has been Ryan for longer than you’ve known you were having a boy and i think you need to put that into perspective. have you tried to think of how big Ryan will feel? and as much as Ryan will adjust to a new name your girls will too
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:06 AM | report
More Suggestions!

Riley (It’s close to Ryan, so may not be as confusing!)

Want More? Like Any?
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:06 AM | report
So your more concerned about confusing your biological children & your family than your adopted son wow! Sure your unborn baby has had that name since you got pregnant but big Ryan has had it for what 3 years now & he actually knows his name! Your selfish and ignorant
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:07 AM | report
Good Lord! We have thought and thought about it, and decided that we’ve already spent SO much money on baby Ryan’s nursery that there is no way we’re going to change his name. You all don’t seem to understand that it is the same thing if we were to change baby Ryan’s name as it is changing big Ryan’s name. We don’t WANT to change his name, but it’s the only option we have right now. HELL, maybe we’ll just call them both Ryan, any less confusing?!?!?!
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 25, 2009 12:09 AM | report
How about Ryan and Bryan?! or Brian!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:10 AM | report
I really don’t like the name Bryan/Brian at all..
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 25, 2009 12:11 AM | report
More Suggestions!

Riley (It’s close to Ryan, so may not be as confusing!)

Want More? Like Any?
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:11 AM | report
I do like Riley, but it’s kinda girly.
posted by Kelsey :: Apr 25, 2009 12:12 AM | report
Okay, let’s see..

posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:14 AM | report
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:15 AM | report
William Isaiah ( Will or Liam )
Levi Isaiah
Jonah Isaiah
Jonathan Isaiah
Cameron Isaiah
Carson Isaiah
Nathan Isaiah
Zachary / Zakary Isaiah
Anthony Isaiah
Jordan Isaiah
Dakota Isaiah
Wesley Isaiah
Brady Isaiah
Hunter Isaiah
Dillon Isaiah
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:17 AM | report
I would call them Big Ryan & Little Ryan
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:20 AM | report
How aboutt Rhys & Ryan!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:23 AM | report
What about making Baby Ryan’s name.. Jacob Ryan instead?!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:29 AM | report
Rylan Isaiah
Riyan Isaiah
Isaiah Ryan (He could still have Ryan)
Ringo Isaiah
Rhys Isaiah
Brayden Isaiah

Need any other names?

I think you should go with what your feeling. People can only make suggestions to you. In the end it’s your choice. I’m not for or against you in your situation. I do know of a lady who changed her daughters name after adopting them it’s not that uncommon. What is your gut feeling telling you to do? Good Luck.
posted by Guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:44 AM | report
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 12:51 AM | report
How about SOL because any parent that would make a child change their name for an unborn baby is in a sad situation. Clearly you will favor your unadopted children. Maybe you could use the personalized room for say the 3 year old and personalize a new room for the baby! I could understand changing an adoptive childs name if it was the same as a born sibling or even just a terrible name, but to change the name of a 3 year old for an unborn baby is selfish. Nearly negates the kind act of adopting a baby. Let some other chlildless couple who can let him keep his name adopt him.
posted by cgh :: Apr 25, 2009 12:58 AM | report
Can you see that little boy going to his new home, opening the door to the "Ryan room" and being so excited? You’ll have to say "No Rhys! This is not your room!" He will be so confused!!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 01:05 AM | report
To all the negative comments being made, why don’t you leave this woman alone. I know many couples who change the name of there adoptive children. In one case it had to be changed because a sibling had the same name. To the previous poster it’s not up to you to say that she would favour her own children over her adopted one. I don’t think that is true.
To everyone posting all she asked for was for names, not for everyone to have a go at her. You may not think it’s a hard decision, but to her it is. She had a name picked out that she loved and now she is the position of adopting a child with the same name. I would also find it hard in some way.
Please give this woman compassion and suggest names for her, don’t give her crap.
Just thought I would add my voice to this post.
posted by Guest :: Apr 25, 2009 01:09 AM | report
Please suggest names for her, not put her down.
posted by Moderator :: Apr 25, 2009 01:14 AM | report
Lets see here . I have given a long list of names & she didn’t respond to them. She only said I don’t like the 1 name she decided to respond to the post. Sounds to me like they will have 2 Ryans. n I understand about changing a childs name but I wouldn’t make the 3 year old change his name & move him into the household & he will have to hear Ryan all the time. He will think he is Ryan. She should’ve known coming onto this site she wouldn’t have evry1 tell her exactly what she wanted to hear !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Use Isaiah as the middle name
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 01:38 AM | report
Can you not change the name in the nursery or give that room to the 3yr old Ryan? I would name the baby Jacob Ryan....just sayin
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 01:53 AM | report
I have a Ryan Jacob.
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 01:54 AM | report
tbh i think it would be better to change the baby’s name seeing as he doesn’t even know that’s his name yet, whereas the older one has been Ryan for a while now and he’ll get confused with having a different name and then a baby with his name, having said that i really like Liam and i think it goes great with Ryan, otherwise i think when big Ryan comes home, call him by both of his names, then slowly just start calling him Isaiah, you can change his names around. my friend’s & her half sister have the same name but one has it as a mn and one has it as a fn.
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 03:59 AM | report
Big Ryan should have the name Ryan because he’s had it for his whole life. Adam Jacob, Luke Jacob, or Christopher Jacob would be very handsome for your baby
posted by torbop22 :: Apr 25, 2009 06:40 AM | report
what does OBGYN mean?
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 07:00 AM | report
OBGYN stands for Obstetrician/Gynecologist .
posted by Guest :: Apr 25, 2009 07:22 AM | report
You can’t post something like that on a public forum and not expect to be harrassed.

Just call them both Ryan and dole out some cute nicknames. The age of three is a pivotal time in a child’s life. This poor boy wants nothing more than to be loved. Not re-named.
posted by guest2527 :: Apr 25, 2009 07:22 AM | report
As I said before keep to the topic and the question asked.
posted by Moderator :: Apr 25, 2009 07:25 AM | report
Were you planning on adopting before you found out you were pregnant? Can you be considered for adoption if you are already pregnant? If you were trying to adopt before you were pregnant, wouldn’t you have already known the adoptive child’s name? If so, then you have no excuse for naming your unborn child the same name. I know people who have adopted, and it takes a long time. Much longer than the few months since you found out your child was a boy. That said, I really think you should reconsider your decision. If you are set, though, then here are a few suggestions.
Isaiah Ryan
Isaiah Bryan
Isaiah Bryant
I think the pp idea of keeping his name, and gradually switching to middle name first, is a good idea.
posted by jen :: Apr 25, 2009 07:33 AM | report
I think that changing a child’s name is not in his best interest....That being said, your reasons for wanting to keep "little Ryan’s" name are selfish and not at all considering Ryan’s feelings and needs. I have to believe that this is not a real poll, only one to stir up trouble...and Moderator, I think the poll poster should stick up for herself, it’s not your job.
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 08:20 AM | report
There is not official "moderator" on this site, who responds to polls and posts, so please don’t pretend to be.
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 08:23 AM | report
This is a fake poll, because no adoption agency or judge would allow you to change the boy’s name for the reasons you state. This is a fact. Aslo, you wold not qualify for adoption with other children and being pregnant, this is also a fact. PLease look up the information you want to create in a fake poll, first.
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 08:27 AM | report
Actually this is a real poll as I am a friend of the poster. Leave her alone. Don’t assume that this is a fake poll. Also there is a moderator for these polls.
posted by Guest and friend of poll poster :: Apr 25, 2009 08:32 AM | report
No, there is not a moderator for these polls that actually posts. Call the number given and they will confirm. They only moderate inappropriate words, polls, and comments by removing them. They do not get involved with the poll.

I think it’s time to stop responding to this poll. The poster, her "friend," and the "moderator" only want us to confirm that changing the name is the right thing to do. She stated she does not care about our opinions (I can certainly see why she is posting on a site that gives opinions on names). She will do what ever she wants regardlee. I only pray that this is a fake poll. And naturally, I would totally believe this poll now because her "friend" said so....
teenagers, ya gotta love their ambition!!!!
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 08:49 AM | report
I think that you should change the baby’s name. The older child already had that name its not fair to change it.
posted by kgale0487 :: Apr 25, 2009 09:25 AM | report
I am an adoptive mom. We were allowed to choose our child’s name, but he was also an infant. Adoption is a wonderful thing, but it is also a big adjustment especially if you have other children, which we did not. There are many studies to show the problems of adopting out of birth order so the biological children and the adoptive child are going to need time to adjust. Ryan Isaiah is going to have a lot to get used to as will your other children. Yes, it is normal for adoptive parents to change the child’s name but I am not sure it would be in the child’s best interest at this point. However, I am no professional. You might want to check with adoption professionals and counselors. The judge will ultimately decide what is in the child’s best interest. If you are set on Ryan, I would suggest keeping both names and calling one child or the other by the middle name.

Also, you can adopt if you are pregnant or have other children. It sometimes depends on the agency or if you are adopting through the state or if it is a private adoption. If a child needs a home and someone is willing to provide a loving, happy home, what does it matter?
posted by guest :: Apr 25, 2009 09:40 AM | report

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