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Huge Dilemma vs. Need Advice

Hello, I have a HUGE problem. My husband is CONSTANTLY saying I could only name the girls and he could only name the boys. I told him we both need to choose a name together to make it fair, but he still won’t budge. I’ve ALWAYS wanted to name my sons Hayden and Kellan. I asked him about opinions of the names, and he said he would use them, a couple weeks later, he acts like he never said anything! I really want to be in the naming process for both the boys and girls, but he won’t budge and will only let me name the girls! What do I do? Please help. Sorry for a long post! Just need advice, thanks! Katheryn

The Top Baby Name is...

Huge Dilemma


Need Advice


Poll created: May 12, 2014
Total Votes: 1


Well, you could sign a restraining order so he has to stay away from you and then name your babys what you want lol
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
Divorce him.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
Have him banned from the hospital.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
I’m sorry but I’m not going to divorce him or put a restraining order on him. I just need advice on what to say to him and how to talk to him about it. Thanks, though
posted by Katheryn :: 4 years ago | report
You should have talked about this before you got married and decided to have children. If you don’t know how to talk to him, do you really think a bunch of strangers who have never met him will know how to convince him that his ideas are ridiculous. Go to counseling.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
You are carrying the child, and while I’d advocate for you having more right to name him/her, I think this should be a joint decision for parents (and can be fun). Carrying a child, even in today’s medical age, can still be a dangerous event. Maybe he has a reason for acting like he does, but you two should speak about it. He’s going to be a soon-to-be father. He should act like one. This is not mature, fatherly behavior. In fact, I find it slightly concerning.
posted by Jamie :: 4 years ago | report
Calmly remind him that your going to be the one pushing a watermelon from your [removed] and that he needs to stop being such a stubborn arse and open his ear holes to your name suggestions
posted by Thatshyrandomperson :: 4 years ago | report
Well then the best thing to do is pray and ask God what to do.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
No offense, Katheryn, but your husband sounds a bit sexist, " I’m the man I name the boys! You are the wife and you name the girls!" First of all, who is the one who goes through the h*ll of pregnancy? You. Who is the one who is only looking for an opinion? You. You two, however, are both the parents. Keep looking for compromises. Marriage is all about sacrifices. Don’t let one have full range of one gender, this will just create bitterness. Decide together. Separately come up with a very long list of names for each gender. Then look over it. Example: " On my list, most of the names for the girls begin with A." "On my list, most of the girl names have three syllables." "Okay, let’s try to find a girl name with both of those characteristics." See? Doesn’t that seem better? Hope you find a solution, good luck.
posted by * :: 4 years ago | report
I would explain, calmly, that you would like to have a part in naming all of your children. It’s not really fair to each get assigned a sex, what if you have five boys? Keep in mind that he may not like the name you have had your heart set on, and you may have to give it up, or use it as a mn. If he still insists, you could try having him watch a natural birthing video and remind him that you should get rewarded for going through that! Good luck
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
I’ve tried and tried telling him, but he’s certain he wants to name the boys. I’ve told him that I don’t want to end up hating my child’s name forever because I didn’t have a part of it, but he still won’t listen and I’m trying
posted by Katheryn :: 4 years ago | report
Poster 9: I’ll try that! Thanks!

Poster 10: He told me that he’d use Hayden, Kellan and Dean because he likes them. Then he tells me he doesn’t like them.
posted by Katheryn :: 4 years ago | report
The child is half you so you deserve to share in the naming decision. If he refuses to negotiate or compromise then leave. Go stay at a a friends or a family members’ home. Do not back down. If this is allowed to happen then what other things will you have no say? This teaches your children that your opinion does not matter. Also the mother is the one who fills out the vitals form so ultimately you are the one naming the child as you fill the form out.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
Your husband sounds like a real winner. I would politely tell him that you either compromise or gets no say. Hospitals give that paper work to the mother. The mother decides who fills it out. And she can leave the name of the father off and give the baby whatever name she wants. Sometime you have to play hardball with stupid sexist pigs.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report
Poster 12: I told him I would be the one signing the birth certificate, but he said he doesn’t care and the name he chooses will go on it. I’ve thought of using Hayden Ethan (he loves Ethan) but they both end in the same sound. He suggested Benjamin to me, but I’ve never liked the name and it makes me cringe.

Poster 13: I know I’ve thought about doing that as I said above for the 12th poster ^
posted by Katheryn :: 4 years ago | report
You’re the mother, you have final say. I wouldn’t use anything he picks if he’s being this big of a sexist [removed] about it.
posted by guest :: 4 years ago | report

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